"If you can play, you can play." Individuals who are publicly taking a stand against homophobia and bullying in sports — including Head Football Coach Jim Mora and Head Gymnastics Coach Valorie Kondos Field — have signed up to become UCLA Athlete Allies, formed by a partnership between the Department of Intercollegiate Athletics and the Department of Cultural and Recreational Affairs. "I just literally pretended that that part of my life did not exist," Bean said. "I didn’t come out until I was around 32. I was just so afraid to be identified in a public way. It was something that I didn’t quite understand or accept."
That’s the simple, but strong message behind a growing movement on campus that fosters respect, inclusion and equality in the sports and recreation community.
Cyd Zeigler moderates a UCLA Athlete Allies panel, featuring Kirk Walker (from left), Caitlin Benyi, Billy Bean, Ben Cohen, Tracey Milburn Bailey and Brian Kitts.
No matter what their sexual orientation, the 500 (and growing) members of UCLA Athlete Allies represent a wide range of people: competitive and recreational student-athletes, coaches, students, faculty, staff, administrators, parents and fans.
On Monday, April 15, in conjunction with the start of Ally Week — a weeklong campus initiative that focuses on exposing students, faculty and staff to the information and tools needed to be an "ally" to the LGBT community — former professional athletes and current coaches raised awareness about homophobia at two presentations. The morning session, "Stand Up Against Homophobia and Bullying in Sports and Recreation," drew a packed house at the Morgan Center of coaches and staff in the athletic department. In the evening, UCLA students who play NCAA Division I, club and recreational sports attended a session at the Wooden Center’s Collins Court.
The first session began with a taped presentation from Super Bowl champion Brendon Ayanbadejo and NFL player Chris Kluwe, both former Bruins and outspoken advocates of the LGBT community. Moderator Cyd Zeigler of Outsports.com followed with questions for a panel of six participants, some of whom were gay and some straight. All of them, however, were passionate about the need to make the sports world a safe and comfortable place for LGBT athletes.
Panelist Billy Bean, a former Major League Baseball player and author, talked about the experience that caused him to quit baseball in the prime of his professional career. He hit the big leagues at age 22, got married and was aiming for the Hall of Fame, he said. Then he met somebody — a man — and left his wife. "I’d had no connection to the gay community," he said. "It was a different world back then. Students have information today that we didn’t have. So it was more of a secret journey."
The biggest mistake he ever made, he said, occurred when he was playing for the San Diego Padres. His partner of three years had died, and at 1 p.m. that same day, Bean played in a game. He never told anyone, not even his family, that he had a gay partner; he just pushed it down and acted like it had never happened. He didn’t even attend his partner’s funeral.
Athletic Department staff members Tim Anderson (left) and Lisa Chow look on as Marc Dellins, director of executive relations, signs the UCLA Athlete Allies pledge.
Panelist Brian Kitts, co-founder of the You Can Play Project, explained how he had coined the term "casual homophobia" to describe language "that everyone has used, like walking into a locker room and saying, ‘What’s up, homo?’ It’s casually throwing ‘fag’ around. It’s language that you are going to have to apologize for when you realize that your brother or your teammate is gay," he explained. "You didn’t mean it, but you said it, and it is that kind of language that You Can Play is especially interested in getting rid of."
One way that You Can Play is promoting this message is to encourage schools to submit anti-homophobia/anti-bullying videos to its website. Currently making the rounds on YouTube is a popular video featuring UCLA head coaches Valorie Kondos Field, Cori Close, Jim Mora and dozens of athletes from several Bruin teams. [See the video at the end of this story.] Kitts also acknowledged two of UCLA’s club teams, figure skating and ice hockey, for being the first teams in North America to submit a video advocating a stand against homophobia.
Panelist Caitlin Benyi, former All-American UCLA softball player and assistant coach at Cal State Northridge, came out publicly for the first time at the symposium, prompting applause from the audience. "I have an influence on young lives, and I need to make sure that I’m comfortable with myself before I’m going to expect them to be comfortable. It’s emotional, obviously, but it’s important, and I understand that," she said.
Other panelists included Ben Cohen, former professional rugby player and founder of the Ben Cohen StandUp Foundation; Tracey Milburn Bailey, former All-Conference UCLA soccer player; and Kirk Walker, UCLA assistant softball coach and member of the Equality Coaching Alliance.
Walker came out in 2006 and is the only male among three openly gay Division I coaches. At the end of the students’ session on Monday, Walker — a member of the UCLA Athlete Allies Committee — enthusiastically discussed UCLA’s role in the movement against homophobia. He saw the two sessions as the beginning of a campus initiative and expressed a desire to create more programs and to continue the dialogue about how UCLA can create a safer environment.
"There are other things happening at other schools, but one thing I’ll say is that I think UCLA can be, and should be, a leader, as it always has been in many aspects of what it means to be a champion," Walker said. "It’s more than just winning on the field; it’s how you win. And how you create opportunity for your athletes to thrive and grow. And that’s really the focal point — trying to be proactive as a group about social change."